If I had to sum it up in just one word, I’d say… Messy.
Messy in that you get almost literally no sleep for the first 6 weeks. That’s not an exaggeration either. When our son was born, he was (like every newborn) up and feeding every 1.5-2 hours. Some nights I was getting 45 minutes sleep all night. When you have a 19-month old toddler in addition to that, you don’t get naps. There is no ‘catching up’ on missed zzz’s. You get up at 6/7am when your toddler wakes and you deal. Yes, chances are Dad will be home for a few weeks, but what’s he going to do for the newborn attached to you? Pop out his nipple? (I have nipples Greg, can you milk me? Soz, totally off topic…). To be honest, while it was hard AF, I was very aware of the fact that a baby waking every few hours meant a healthy baby. For that, I was grateful. I complained, but my heart knew I was (and am!!) blessed as shit.
Messy in that the way you get out of bed in the morning is how you’re gonna look all day long. My hair went unwashed for way too long. There was no time for nice long warm showers. Getting dressed for the day was sometimes impossible (or a waste of time because you are covered in spew in a matter of minutes anyway). Make up? Chyeah, right. I didn’t even get to put my face moisturiser on some days. A small, seemingly insignificant thing but these are the small things you will miss in the first weeks. But having two beautiful healthy babies to wake up to every morning is the life I always wished for myself. I would sit among the noise and drink my (strong, hot, beautiful, quiet) cup of coffee smiling while picturing the future with these two little humans we created. How FUN is this gonna be!! (Ask me in a few years time LEL).
Messy in that you are terrified to leave the house with them on your own at the start. Why? Because you’re now outnumbered. What the F would I do if they both started cracking it? Put Brodie on the boob but leave Taylor to throw a tanty? How would I handle that? Nope. That was way too stressful. I actually became anxious just thinking about it. We left our outings for when Dad was home (thank goodness for Coles Click n Collect). It was 6 weeks in when I finally had my first outing with them by myself. I planned a play date with some other mum friends. Then I cancelled in the morning because I got scared. Thankfully, one of the mum friends reminded me that I wouldn’t be alone and that they would be there to be an extra set of hands if I needed and so I went. It was a good way to start. From then, we did regular outings without Dad. It got easier. My toddler LOVES getting out and about, even if just to Coles (so imagine how hard shit is right now with self isolation… safe to say we are being kept on our toes to keep her entertained). Brodie also used to sleep in the carrier so believe it or not, it actually became quite relaxing for me to do the food shopping as I had two content babes.
Messy in that you will prob forget something in the nappy bag almost every time you leave the house, and the nappy bag is now ridiculously full. Go to the beach and you need 2 bags. One for the standard nappy bag stuff, the other for towels, hats, change of clothes etc. Remembering everything you will need for both babes when out and about is tricky-tricky lemonn bikky. Those GOSH DARN nappy wipes get me every time. Thank goodness for Mummies in baby rooms who know the situation all too well and are happy to spare a few squares.
Messy in that it will now take you forever to get out the front door. ‘Let’s just pop down for a quick beach walk and coffee’ is not something you’ll say anymore. It takes preparation. Aint no spontaneous trips anywhere with two babies under two.
Messy in that both babies are almost always going to need you at the same time. Brodie cried and then Taylor cried, often because she just wanted to remind me that she too is my baby and that she still needs me. Not that I would ever forget. How could I? She’s the light of my life. As is Brodie.
Messy in that you will cry now and then and experience approx 1.25 million emotions per day. But crying can be healthy, and it won’t just be tears of frustration… I cried many tears of happiness for this wonderful life we have. Lots.
Messy in that you will get no housework done some days. But do your kids care about the house? Does your husband care about the house? Lower your expectations and you will do just fine. Sometimes all you can do for the day is be a Mum and be there for your kids. That in itself is a bloody big and hugely important job. Unloading the dishwasher and folding the washing just doesn’t compare.
Look, there are lots of things I could tell you about having two babies under two. Right now, Brodie is one-week off being 8-moths old and Taylor is 2 years, 3 months. It’s a fun age. Brodie is crawling and standing up on things and LOVES being around his sister. Follows her everywhere. They laugh just looking at each other and they really do have a special bond and connection that no one else could understand. It’s seriously the best thing to watch – your two babies together, loving, caring and playing together. It’s hard. Extremely challenging – particularly the no sleep thing (which I am currently experiencing with Brodie who is teething, having stomach problems and battling a viral infection), but it really is so freaking wonderful. At the end of the day I have these two beautiful little humans running around me and together with their Dad, we make a bloody good team. I’d not have it any other way.